phobia

it's interesting. my headline. hehehehe. i think i have a serious autistic syndrome. but, since i can adapt well n live normally, so i think my syndrome is not that serious. well...well...well... for a start, i'm a loner. *soundtrack:weottoriya by CNBlue. i don't like being in a place full of people. i love doing my things/ jobs/ works on my own.

i am very sensitive about place. every little things must be placed in the place that i put them. if the broom is on my bed, let it be. i hate it when people touch n mess up with my personal belongings. l0l!

our counselor once asked us to draw a circle. i draw the circle clockwise-as in from right to left. do u normally do that?? hahahaha. normal people draw a circle anti-clockwise. only those with autism draw it clockwise. l0l!

then, i hate sharing. people say sharing is caring. but truthfully, i really hate sharing what's mine. but since i live in this totally sharing-is-caring-world, so i had to learn to share my everything with people. so..so..so..

enough with the autism problem. i have phobias. well, everybody does. it's only about admitting it. as for me, i admit that i'm claustrophobic and hemophobic. i admitted it. i accept the truth long ago. it's true that i'm afraid of blood. even looking at the blood on tv can make me having nightmare. zazzz!!! i can smell blood even how small the quantity is- esp the period blood. the smell blooms well.... l0l! hm....i'm afraid of small places. when there's this place full of people, usually i'll having trouble breathing normally.

well, right now i'm adapting since i'm living in a crowded society. i think i may overcome those problem sooner or later. but, not blood i think. i may faint if i see stefan suck someone's blood LIVE-in-front-of me.

now having slight headache. the weather is the worst. it makes my problem gone from bad to worst. i'm coughing. n i hate it. l0l!

happy chinese new year n happy holiday.

sleepy
XOXO

raining

i love RAIN. really love rain. it's my favorite time. when it's raining.... ah! it feels so good now. the rain is pouring outside. the wind blowing. jung il woo is sitting next to me~~hahahaha!! *fantastic fantasy :p

but, since i live in this building, i can't touch the rain. huh!! disappointing! i love touch the rain. it fells great, doncha think so? hehehehehe
so, when i have a house, i'll make sure there'll be an open balcony for me to play with the rain everytime mr.rain coming~~ yeahoooooooo.........

no...the rain almost stop. no...no..no...please don't stop the rain!! #crazyoverrain!

i had my breakfast just now. now, with the rain n the cold wind, i feel like sleeping. okey, i'll sleep in a while. please, continue raining~~

checking my shopping list makes me wanna go shopping badly! ugrh!!! why women love (as in crazily in love) with shopping?? huh!! even i look tough but i still love shopping. n that's why i'm still a yeoja~~ hehehe :)

can't wait to go shopping!!! cny holiday, come faster!! palli wa~~ bi, kajimara~

rain gives me a lot of comfort. when i feel depress, i hope there'll be rain cuz watching the rain makes me feel like it wash away all my worries~ when i'm bored, i hope there's rain. it'll make me happy. when i'm exhauted, i hope there's rain. i'll make me forget everything n just quietly sleep on my bed. when i'm out of idea, i hope there's rain n the ideas will overflowing...flowing...flowing.... da chuaheyo, bi-sama! aishiteru, rain-san~~ i love u, rain!

ren (rain) is also my name. so, i feel connected to the rain for some reasons. i guess. i hope, my future spouse will propose in the rain. i'll be really great, right? hahaha. i'd be too great if it's jung ill woo. or kyuhyun. or lee jun ki. hahahahaha #imagination #flowerboydisease~

p/s. i got my MUET result. guess what?? i did well, or so i think. well, i manage to maintain my band. otsukare-sama ren!! i scored band 4!!! omedetou!! *i'm happy for myself as i didn't have much confidence to score well. huh! thanx GOD~

silent hour.
XOXO

looking back

well,,,it's a pleasure weekend. cannot wait for heavenly weekend at home. CNY..CNY..come faster. can we just delete next week so we can move straight to the next? l0l!

problem is, my pc isn't working very well. not to my expectation. *is it my pc or just the software? dunno. i just hate MPCStar. it makes my pleasuring movie time crashed! i need another software to take mpc's place in case he annoyed me again. huh!

ra.one. hahahaha...shah rukh khan sure roxx!! love u shah rukh~~ i miss his movie~
wokey...jaejong vs jisung time. let's protect the boss~~
*i am no fan of jaejong anymore. since he left dbsk, i stop rooting for him. i adore yunho n changmin now for giving me a reason for always being a CASSIE.

my new crush?? this cute guy with super long leg. jung il woo~~ peace!
downloading vamp.diaries S3E10 n GG season 4~ l0l!

go die serena. let chuck live instead.
XOXO

bitch vs bitch

well,,, the entry sound pretty harsh.but since when do i talk flowers, huh?
things gotten out of control now. being one year away from my final year sure gives me sometime to think back what happen these years. not to mention i need to start thinking bout my thesis. l0l~ i dunno how to write thesis, in fact, i have no idea wtf thesis is. who cares?

hungry for more kdrama as the lists of drama getting crazily longer n longer. but no source. i wanna watch spu myeong wol, miss ripley, thousand kisses, greatest love...etc...etc..etc...l0l~

well, it's morning. wanna talk bout s and b? apparently i hate S character since forever. even B is a cunning bitch n always plotting something bad, but at least she's honest n said her heart out. so, go B. i think u're a lot hotter than S. seriously? she's just showing off her silicon boobs. nothing's worth it. but i hate what happen to C. i hope i have source for the season 4 n 5. i hate downloading them myself~~urgh!

did i mention that para kiss-the movie version with mukai osamu as george- doesn't have any romantic yet tragic love story bout george n yukari. i'm kinda dissappointed. the 18 scenes are all cut-which i don't really mind, but making the relationship of george n yukari helplessly romantic? urgh!! that's so not ai yazawa style of endeing her comic. well, in NANA, ren did die n leave nana alone. in para kiss comic, yukari n george did break up n yukari is marrying hiro. so, so,,,
but people do loves happy ending, right?

sleepy? well, i need my beauty sleep at least a few decent hours. so, till then.
XOXO

new year, new semester

it's jan, 4th 2012. well. if u've watched the 2012 movie *with the gay lambert singing for the ost*, u don't really thing that this is the end a.k.a apocalypse, right? well...such an intro for 2012

well peps, happy new year to me. today is officially my first day of my 5th semester. i couldn't believe it myself. i'm in my 4th year now....duh!

it's new year n new semester so i wanna start afresh. like really fresh. no more scorned woman acting or any betrayer drama. whatever happen in the past is in the past. i'm a wise woman and i'm letting all that happen slide. besides, i'll fee sorry if i let all that crap haunted me for the rest of my life in campus life. duh..it's not worth it~

dunno wha else to talk here, just wanna update my bored-life in my blog. oh, update! my sis got married last month, well last year to be exact. so, hiya to my cool but delicate bro-in-law, ijam. hope to see juniors next year~ i'd love to be an aunt.

another update? my sis-like my younger sis, is getting married maybe next month or another next month. but she definitely getting married before i even got a boyfriend. duh!!! i'm suck~ really. but to my sis n younger sis, i'm happy for both of you. and welcome in advance to the family my another bro-in-law wanna be,sazali.

with all people getting married, should i really considering dating? the answer is always a BIG NO. let the fate find the destiny. i'm not desperate~ *well, i adore scorned-cunning woman like blair waldorf. i wanna be one too :)

till then. night, world.
XOXO